Monday, May 28, 2012

I'm Only 34, Dammit!

I was talking with my man, who has MS, about how we waddle like penguins sometimes because our legs don't work right.  We were laughing about it, but then I mentioned how I see elderly people who move better than I do, and it made me sad.  Like really hit me.  I started crying because I feel I'm too young to be hurting this much.  This sucks.


I just want more good days and they're not coming.  Most days my pain is about an 8 on the 1-10 scale and on a good day it's down to 5-6.  On those days, some of the pain is replaced by numbness.  I love those days, they just don't come around very often.


I also just tried to get some juice and could barely pick up the jug.  Then I couldn't open it, so Nathan had to do it for me.  He also helped me do housework today.  I feel so useless...like a big pain in the arse.


Maybe I should go away so I'm not such a bother.

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