I was talking with my man, who has MS, about how we waddle like penguins sometimes because our legs don't work right. We were laughing about it, but then I mentioned how I see elderly people who move better than I do, and it made me sad. Like really hit me. I started crying because I feel I'm too young to be hurting this much. This sucks.
I just want more good days and they're not coming. Most days my pain is about an 8 on the 1-10 scale and on a good day it's down to 5-6. On those days, some of the pain is replaced by numbness. I love those days, they just don't come around very often.
I also just tried to get some juice and could barely pick up the jug. Then I couldn't open it, so Nathan had to do it for me. He also helped me do housework today. I feel so useless...like a big pain in the arse.
Maybe I should go away so I'm not such a bother.
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